Tag Archives: Magic

Expect spellcasting. Spoon bending doesn’t count.

A Certain Magical Index – Anime Review

Japanese Title: Toaru Majutsu no Index

 

Related: A Certain Scientific Railgun (spin-off – included in review)

Similar: Strike the Blood

Guilty Crown

Shakugan no Shana

 

Watched in: Japanese & English

Genre: Supernatural Action Science Fiction

Length: 48 episodes (Index – 2 seasons), 48 episodes (Railgun – 2 seasons), 4 OVA, 1 movie

 

Positives:

  • Nothing.

Negatives:

  • Won’t shut up about character names.
  • Talks more about abilities rather than using them.
  • Insufferable characters.
  • Moronic through and through.
  • Almost all dialogue is useless.

(Request an anime for review here.)

So close. So close! We were this close to peak stupidity. We have idiotic characters, some of anime’s tropes at their worst, and fantasy mechanics so lazy that you could shuffle a fantasy/sci-fi deck and pick at random to create something better.

A Certain Magical Index is set in Academy City, a place where magic meets science and most citizens have a supernatural power. Kamijou is unique among the populace, for his ability cancels out the abilities of others. He doesn’t need it though since he keeps his nose out of trouble. This easy life changes when a nun girl called Index Librorum Prohibitorum containing over 100,000 magical texts in her brain comes under his protection. A powerful organisation of psychics would love to crack that skull of hers and see what knowledge comes tumbling out.

The first issue the author should have nixed in the planning phase was Kamijou’s tension nullifying ability – sorry, I meant his ability to nullify others. The most powerful enemies throw everything they have at him and he flicks them away as if it’s nothing. What’s the point? Nullifying characters aren’t new and have worked in other fiction. Usually, the character has to hold onto the enemy to nullify their power, thus limiting the range and giving a counter (throw him off), or the nullification puts them on even footing but the character still has to win a standard sword fight (a.k.a. No Items, Fox Only, Final Destination). For Kamijou, it’s a free win. So again I ask, what’s the point?

Needless to say, the action sucks.

Then we come to the characters, each of which are insufferable from the first meeting. Where to start? The eight-year-old girl we’re supposed to believe is a 30-year-old teacher? The 25-year-old guy we’re supposed to believe is 14? The character who thinks being able to tell the time without a clock is the coolest skill ever? Or each character’s obsession with secret names? Every fight, half the dialogue is about their stupid names, as if anyone would care. If it revealed some secret identity or twist that changed the flow of battle, sure, but it doesn’t.

What I said about the 8-year-old looking teacher and the middle-aged teen is serious, by the way. Index takes anime tropes and cranks them up to the max unironically. It’s possible the author was trying to be ironic, but I suspect he just copied from all other supernatural high school anime like a hack. Wouldn’t it be cool if allies fought each other for no discernible reason?

Oh yeah, I haven’t talked about Kamijou himself. There’s nothing to say. He’s the generic “nice guy” protagonist of this genre. Meanwhile, Index is a typical moe genki girl that should have taken a shotgun to the jaw in episode 1.

The worst aspect of Index has to be the dialogue, which is almost entirely exposition to explain the awful mechanics and lore of this world. We aren’t watching a story. We are hearing the author read aloud his world-building diary (a bad world build at that) instead.

There is so much useless dialogue. It doesn’t get any worse than when it introduces the Misaka clones that talk in the third person with dialogue tags. Not only is it overused, but also makes no sense. And just when you think the clones are finally gone, one returns as a naked loli – still narrating in the third person – with the added twist of saying her name twice each line. Yay! (If ISIS ever takes me, all they need to break me is her dialogue on repeat.) And she has clones!

The audience has no reason to care about anything. Characters talk and talk instead of having personalities and development. They even talk about their abilities more than they use them! Not that it really matters. The abilities are unimaginative and as mentioned previously, don’t affect the protagonist.

Yet with all that said, this isn’t as bad as it could be. The abilities look alright and I’ve seen worse animation. The pacing is fine as well. I wish they had put more effort into making A Certain Magical Index so bad it’s good. It’s just bad.

In the end, I only have one question. How in hell did this garbage get multiple seasons and spin-offs?

Art – Low

The character designs are among the worst in anime. The spell effects are alright though and the animation could be worse.

Sound – Very Low

This awful script has padding, not characters. There is so much dumb here that it will leave you speechless.

Story – Very Low

One super powered teen in a city of many must protect a walking library from a villainous organisation. No one could save this story.

Overall Quality – Very Low

Recommendation: Avoid it. Unless you want to walk into the den of stupidity, avoid A Certain Magical Index and all its spin-offs at all costs.

(Request reviews here. Find out more about the rating system here.)

 

Awards: (hover over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)

Positive: None

Negative: 

Awful DialogueHollow World BuildingHorrendous ActionInduces StupidityNo DevelopmentRubbish Major CharactersUseless Side Cast

Advertisements

Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle – Anime Review

Japanese Title: Tsubasa Chronicle

 

Related: xxxHOLiC (same universe)

Similar: Cardcaptor Sakura

Pandora Hearts

InuYasha

 

Watched in: Japanese & English

Genre: Action Adventure Fantasy Romance

Length: 52 episodes (2 seasons)

 

Positives:

  • Good music.

Negatives:

  • No style.
  • No tension.
  • No reason to care.
  • No interesting characters.

(Request an anime for review here.)

Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is so boring that I only tried to answer one question before its end: Is this Sakura the same as the one from Cardcaptor Sakura? They look the same and share a name. Turns out, no, they aren’t the same. The author was just too lazy to come up someone new. Well, that’s it, end of review – see you next time!

What, you want me to talk about this anime? What is there to say? Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is so full of nothing that there is nothing to talk about.

Syaoran and Sakura are a young teen couple madly in love, but when she grows wings and her feathers disperse into other dimensions, she loses her precious memories including those of him. Syaoran starts hopping through dimensions to different worlds, where he meets a ninja torn from his world, a magician, and the rabbit thing Mokona from xxxHOLiC (one of the dimensions), who help recollect her feathers.

Initially, I liked how Syaoran and Sakura started as a couple – unusual for teen anime – as I believed it meant skip over the shy “will they, won’t they” nature of anime romance and go straight to developing them as a couple. Unfortunately, when she loses her feathers, she transforms into a comatose slab of boring that occasionally wakes up.

The narrative doesn’t take time to establish these two in our hearts for us to care when Sakura goes down. Why do they love each other? This is supposedly a love so strong it transcends time and space, yet we have no reason to believe it. Even once she stops sleeping so much in later episodes, she’s as empty headed as one can imagine. The author wanted to start on the big moment of her losing her memories, which is fine, but she then needed to work harder to make us care through flashbacks, or something.

Looking past this empty couple, there is nothing else to see. The action is boring as sin with its series of meaningless fights and poor animation. Cardcaptor Sakura has better action than this action series (and its collecting element is stronger). Not even using a Pokémon-like approach to the battles with magical companions can make it interesting. The action feels like filler with no end in sight since they extend the quest on a whim by saying, “Well, you’ve collected 200 feathers so far, but there’s another 100 to go! … Wait, did I say 100? I meant 300!”

Don’t fall for it. Don’t waste your time with Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. This is a contender for the Most Boring Anime of All Time award.

Art – Low

The characters look too similar to other CLAMP titles, the animation is poor, and the colouring is desaturated in season 1. It’s hard to take the drama seriously when everyone looks like Jack Skellington with giant hands. This is moving manga with worse character art than the manga.

Sound – Medium

The acting is fine, I suppose, considering the script has nothing to say. The music is the only good element, a little reminiscent of .hack//Sign’s excellent soundtrack.

Story – Low

A boy travels to different dimensions to recollect his girlfriend’s lost memories with the aid of unlikely allies. So full of nothing, Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle gives you no reason to care.

Overall Quality – Low

Recommendation: Skip it. There isn’t anything awful about Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle, but that’s not a reason to watch something.

(Request reviews here. Find out more about the rating system here.)

 

Awards: (hover over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)

Positive: None

Negative: None

The Garden of Sinners – Anime Review

Japanese Title: Kara no Kyoukai

 

Similar: Rin: Daughters of Mnemosyne

Darker than Black

Ghost Hunt

Key the Metal Idol

 

Watched in: Japanese

Genre: Supernatural Action Mystery Thriller

Length: 9 movies (35 min. to 2 hrs. each)

 

Positives:

  • Beautiful environments.
  • Fantastic soundtrack.

Negatives:

  • Dead eyes syndrome.
  • Atrocious editing and pacing.
  • No one has a personality.

(Request an anime for review here.)

The Garden of Sinners is an unusual anime series. I’m not sure if you can refer to it as a series, in the standard sense, for it is nine movies of vastly varying length – 35 minutes to 2 hours long. Furthermore, the movies aren’t connected much beyond the main characters and subject matter. It’s akin to older British detective serials like Poirot, where little of the story carries from one episode to the next, which allows the audience to join any week in the series on TV without feeling lost.

Using this series structure, The Garden of Sinners tells of a detective agency that takes on cases involving the supernatural – spirits, curses, and the like. The agency has three members: the sorceress Touko, able to create human-like dolls, the ordinary human Kokutou, and part-doll protagonist Shiki. She has the “Mystic Eyes of Death Perception”, a power that allows her to see a target’s “lifelines” that will kill them when cut. (That’s how they deal with the supernatural entities.)

The first movie follows a string of suicides by schoolgirls all leaping from the same skyscraper set for demolishment. On paper, this is an interesting anime, just my sort of thing. I love contemporary supernatural stories and I am a ravenous consumer of detective serials. This should be a direct feed of serotonin to my brain injected via a syringe of intriguing mystery, complex characters, fascinating mysticism, and unpredictable story. The Garden of Sinners has none of that.

The most glaring issue is that none of these characters has a personality. This should come as no surprise from the same author who brought us the worse-than-Twilight of anime that is Fate/stay night. Shiki is, by intention, an emotionally repressed person. However, once again, like a bloody broken record, I must stress that emotionally repressed does not equate to zero personality, never mind the other characters who are meant to be real people. I can’t imagine what the authors of these soulless characters think mute people must be like in real life. Do they think that mutes will have no personality because they can’t speak?

This lack of soul bleeds into the mysteries themselves. The narrative never makes an effort to have the audience care for the answers to its questions. It assumes that because it hasn’t given us an answer, we must therefore care to know the answer. I hear my neighbour arguing with her daughter in Mandarin on occasion. I’m not interested to translate what they are saying (daughter probably stays out too late). Have the police turn up to cart away a third person I never knew was there and then you have my attention.

The Garden of Sinners tries to con the audience into thinking it has an intricate plot full of hidden details and deeper meaning, when in fact, it is poor structure and storytelling. “This is really complicated – it must be good!”

To compound problems, the editing is a slog. Many shots hold for too long. It’s just a few seconds here and there, but it doesn’t feel right and adds up over time. Directors and editors don’t have to follow set rules for how long a shot should be. Breaking the rules can create an effect. One can let the camera linger for a few seconds to make the audience feel awkward. An extreme close-up, right in a character’s face as they’re talking creates extreme discomfort in the viewer as desired. However, when breaking the rules, it must be with care. Should the effect backfire, it makes the editing seem amateur, as is often the case in The Garden of Sinners. This isn’t deal breaking, but these long shots do allow us to ponder on the fact that the story and characters are empty.

The exception is the fifth movie about a double homicide that never happened. The visuals take a hit in quality, though do get more consistent, and the editing is much tighter. It feels like a different studio’s production. Despite it being nearly 2 hours long, it’s much easier to get through than the movies half its length because things are happening at pace. There is more energy, more life to it all. Doesn’t magically turn into a great movie, mind you, but it shows how much of a difference editing makes.

Before I leave you, I must touch upon the most forced product placement I have seen in anime. The first movie opens on Häagen-Dazs strawberry ice cream, drawing some equation between it and Shiki’s personality. And it returns to the ice cream again later. It is…fascinatingly shocking how blatant this advertising is. I don’t know what to make of it.

Art – High

The good old “dead eyes” syndrome studio ufotable is known for makes a return. The editing needs a lot of work, except in movie five. The animation is a mix of long stills broken up by shots of high animation, some in first person. The environments and atmospherics are beautiful.

Sound – Medium

The one and only thing I will take away from this is the soundtrack. I love the melodies and I am a sucker for ethereal vocals. As for the acting, it seems the actors were told to never have emotion in their voice, and under no circumstances are they to have any range. No talent allowed here!

Story – Low

A detective agency dealing with the supernatural investigates a series of mysterious cases. There is no adequate reason The Garden of Sinners needed to be so long and so slow, nor is there a reason to have such soulless characters.

Overall Quality – Medium

Recommendation: Don’t bother. The Garden of Sinners isn’t the worst anime – rather average, all things considered – but it is certainly one of the dullest. I can’t recommend anyone waste their time. If you must, then just watch the fifth entry as a standalone movie.

(Request reviews here. Find out more about the rating system here.)

 

Awards: (hover over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)

Positive:

Great Music

Negative:

Poor Pacing

Tenchi Muyo! War on Geminar – Anime Review

Japanese Title: Isekai no Seikishi Monogatari

 

Related: Tenchi Muyo (main series)

Similar: Vision of Escaflowne

Vandread

Familiar of Zero

 

Watched in: Japanese & English

Genre: Action Comedy Ecchi Harem Fantasy

Length: 13 episodes (45 min. each)

 

Positives:

  • Pretty cool world design.

Negatives:

  • The perfect protagonist.
  • So much stupid.
  • Glaring audio and visual hiccups.
  • Really, really

(Request an anime for review here.)

The original, janky, and rather rubbish Tenchi Muyo was an anime I occasionally caught on TV an eon ago. I never made an effort to watch much of it, since it was a harem with awful art. A decade later, I stumbled upon a page regarding Tenchi Muyo! War on Geminar, which had far superior art and positive buzz from fans. How could Tenchi Muyo have produced anything that wasn’t garbage? And so, with many more years passed since then, it’s finally time to end my curiosity and see the fuss.

This story has Kenshi, younger brother of original Tenchi Muyo’s protagonist, teleported to the fantasy world of Geminar with a mission to assassinate Princess Lashara, but he fails and becomes her slave before eventually fighting for her against his summoners.

War on Geminar makes a good first impression with its visual production. While not unusual by today’s standards, it was rare for what is evidently an otaku-only anime to have an animation budget – sliding stills and big boobs were the expectation. The world design also has creativity. The reptilian mech designs look good, animated fluidly in duels, and I love the idea of an airship being a landmass with a palace and forest on top. Sure, the first episode has harem markers and some fan service barf, but my impression is positive. This is nothing like the Tenchi Muyo I remember. What is this grand magi-tech fantasy kingdom?

However, once the story settles in and starts churning through daily life in Geminar, everything turns to crap. We meet all the girls of his harem, covering every harem archetype to draw in the maximum otaku audience (see cover image of this review up top for the full selection). Whatever one’s preference, War on Geminar has the girl for you. Of course, none of them has an iota of depth, their sole purpose in the anime being to fulfil the obligations of their archetype. It’s stupid interaction after moronic interaction with Kenshi. They almost have depth, right up until the harem tropes undermine their arc to keep them in the pit of trash.

Where it becomes truly atrocious though, is with Kenshi. Allow me to introduce you to the most Mary Sue character in anime. You think you know, but you don’t.

Lashara puts Kenshi to work in the high-class girls’ school as handyman, a Jack-of-All-Trades; except, the writer forgot the “master of none” part of the Jack-of-All-Trades. Kenshi is perfect at everything on his first day. Housekeeping, brick laying, shoemaking, construction work, five-star cooking, delivery, climbing, running, sword fighting – you name it, Kenshi is the best at it first try. Every girl in school is after him, but because he’s so fast and never tires, they all drop of exhaustion. His massage skills are so great that a single grope from him will leave any girl in a permanent state of crippling arousal, for some reason. Then every girl wants him to wash her back during bath time.

Wait, wasn’t this some fantasy anime with mechs? Yep, that’s what it claims.

War on Geminar has an identity problem. It can’t decide if it wants to be a fantasy war series or a high school harem. Once you strip away all art (which has weakened after a few episodes) and all the flash, this is just another bad harem. The highest budget harem you should perhaps watch for its terribleness, certainly, but still a bad harem like any other at its core.

Art – Medium

War on Geminar appears to have great art at first glance. From characters to world design, this looks far better than the original Tenchi Muyo. I like the mech designs and flying palace. There is good animation during duels, but has so much awful outside that – static shots, repeating animations that linger, and some horrible shots. One instance has smoke billowing out of a building, and when the building tips over, so does the smoke pillar. Yes, the smoke in the air “tips” over.

Sound – Very Low

The writing turns you into an idiot. The princess who speaks in third person is especially dumb. Full of kewl quips and one-liners. Even the sound design is poor, which is rare – I mean rare. For example, the guy running on grass makes the sound of heels on tiles. Why?

Story – Very Low

A boy mysteriously teleported to another world joins a cast of girls to defend the empire. This is the highest budget harem garbage ever made, Mary Sue protagonist included.

Overall Quality – Very Low

Recommendation: Avoid it or a must watch for garbage. Tenchi Muyo! War on Geminar’s production values make it easier to watch that other “so bad it’s good” titles, so if you want some absolute trash, then have fun with this one.

(Request reviews here. Find out more about the rating system here.)

 

Awards: (hover over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)

Positive: None

Negative:

Awful DialogueInduces StupidityMary SueRubbish Major Characters

The Devil Is a Part-Timer – Anime Review

Japanese Title: Hataraku Maou-sama!

 

Similar: The World God Only Knows

Noragami

Maoyu: Archenemy & Hero

 

Watched in: Japanese & English

Genre: Supernatural Comedy Romance

Length: 13 episodes

 

Positives:

  • Funny for a few episodes.

Negatives:

  • Initial setup is barely relevant.
  • Satan starts as a generic good guy.
  • The extra girls.

(Request an anime for review here.)

The premise of The Devil is a Part-Timer is straightforward. Satan, ruler of darkness, snuffer of light, finds himself torn from his world of magic and thrust into modern Tokyo, where he must get a part-time job at “MgRonald’s” to pay for life in the big city.

This premise also has almost nothing to do with The Devil is a Part-Timer.

One would imagine that the master of evil, as depicted in the prologue, would be, well, you know, evil. Instead, we have a generic good guy protagonist with no defining traits. Satan starts out good!

There is no point to him being the devil. I am not exaggerating when I say that he does nothing evil whatsoever. He starts as a good guy; he ends as a good guy. No arc, no development, no point. This wouldn’t necessarily be a problem, as plenty of stories invert the roles – angels and nuns are evil, while devils and gangsters are good. Nothing new there. But the problem by doing this in The Devil is a Part-Timer, beyond going against the setup, is that the series leads nowhere. When a protagonist starts at the end of his arc, he has nowhere to go. His story is already over, so why is he protagonist? I expected some “twist” to reveal that the prologue was a lie, that Satan had been trying to save the world and the angels were evil from the start, at least. The actual plot events, which have a little action, feel so irrelevant because there is no lasting effect.

Furthermore, this leads to stale humour. Satan runs into Emi in the first episode, one of the angels that followed through the portal hunt him down. She works in a call centre now. Predictably, she uses the good ol’ “I must stay close by to kill you when I can” excuse to hang around the guy she’s secretly falling for. It’s funny, at first. However, since he doesn’t change and she’s already friendly with him in that tsundere sort of way, the scenario doesn’t evolve to generate new humour.

Change in this series arrives in the form of more characters – Satan’s generals and the other angels. Much like Emi, these join the good guys under one low-rent roof almost immediately. The Devil is a Part-Timer becomes borderline harem. Only two girls throw themselves at Satan – Emi and his little co-worker – but the vibe and social dynamics are reminiscent of a tame harem. They don’t shift the status quo.

It is funny for a few episodes – I laughed at these fish out of water figuring out how to open a bank account and managing a budget – and it isn’t awful like most harem anime, but the lack of relevance to the setup and absence of direction wears thin before long. If you go in knowing the title matters little and want an easy comedy, requiring no effort, there might be enough for you here. And the 13-episode length isn’t demanding. It just needed more effort to be anything beyond that.

Art – Medium

The opening scenes of backstory that paint a dark fantasy picture are far better than the rest of the series, which is average.

Sound – Medium

The acting is fine. However, the fictional language akin to a mix of English and Latin makes it tough to watch in Japanese, where the actors aren’t even in the ballpark of pronunciation. I suppose, as a fictional language, you technically can’t get it wrong. It’s mostly in the first episode, so once past that, go with whichever language you prefer.

Story – Low

Ripped through a portal into modern Tokyo, Satan must find part-time work to earn a living with his general as angels and other demons seek him out. It starts funny, but the choice to make Satan a good guy immediately and to have several girls around him, turns The Devil Is a Part-Timer into a rather bland comedy.

Overall Quality – Low

Recommendation: For anime comedy fans only. The Devil Is a Part-Timer is for fans of the “anime version” of a common premise. Its execution isn’t good enough for most.

(Request reviews here. Find out more about the rating system here.)

 

Awards: (hover over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)

Positive: None

Negative:

No Development