Japanese Title: Abenobashi Mahou Shoutengai
Watched in: Japanese.
Length: 13 episodes.
- No visual detail, other than breast physics.
- Mind-numbing characters meandering through a pathetic plot.
- Several disturbing elements like underage nudity.
- Unfunny comedy.
- The character voice work, especially for the protagonists, is either loud or whiny at all times, which gets annoying fast.
Where to start, where to start… This anime is terrible. There is really no other way to put it. I could probably leave it at that and advise you never lay eyes on this abomination, but you deserve elaboration.
The characters are awful. Not a single one of them is redeemable in any way. Every episode, you have to endure obnoxious character after obnoxious character, especially the leads. The boy, Sasshi, spends all his time either yelling like a twit or fantasising about fondling – among other things – the breasts of his older sister and grandmother… (As I write this, he just made out with his grandmother…)
No, you didn’t misread.
He is rounded out in stupidity by his friend, Arumi, who yells just as much he does, but thankfully doesn’t dream of groping her family. When she isn’t yelling, Arumi keeps hitting the kid over the head with a paper fan – typical aggressive anime girl behaviour – only, she doesn’t hit him when he’s at his stupidest. To be fair, that would mean her hitting him non-stop. For a comedy, they simply aren’t funny.
The supporting cast in no better. We have this old woman, (possibly a man, though she does have personal airbags on her) who hits on the kid, a low teen…and likes to be whipped and ridden by little boys. Sasshi’s older sister is even creepier as she’s always in the least amount of clothing for her younger brother…and likes to play dominatrix with her father and grandfather, followed by her brother. This has got to be some twisted fan-fiction; it’s the only explanation. There’s also a blue haired man called Abe, I think (unmemorable), who is supposed to be the sage or sorcerer of this world, or something. I have no idea, as he’s pointless.
The greatest mental challenge this anime presents is whether the characters or story are worse. The narrative, such nonsense, is difficult to describe. Best I give you random bits first (it will make just as much sense either way.)
It starts with the news that the restaurant owned by the girl’s family will be closing, the latest of many shops in the same shopping centre. That’s where the normality ends. Dragons appear in the sky, old people morph into mushrooms, and a rainbow bridge manifests before them. The two kids are transported to different worlds, each depicting the shopping arcade in alternate realities, a parody of something famous: Voltron, Bruce Lee, film noire, JRPGs, Apocalypse Now, etc. This isn’t anything new, to use a different pre-established world episode to episode, and has produced great results in the likes of Doctor Who. With Abenobashi however, it is nothing more than a gimmick, as the humour has nothing to do with the parody subject. Take, for example, the film noire episode: the joke is that getting shot turns you into a comic relief midget… Yeah, I don’t get it.
In the JRPG parody, they defeat the Great Evil Lord, a giant skeleton in armour, by waving a giant floppy sword (not a euphemism) at its chest so that its breasts inflate to such a massive size that, get this, it falls over and they pop, defeating the creature… I can’t make this up.
Wait there’s more! There are breasts bouncing around as balls, dinosaurs with breasts bigger than their heads, and you have to watch the kid urinate while running with his seabiscuit in hand. The humour is random and relies too much on the characters being imbeciles. They try throw a twist to the story, but since I care naught for anything at this point, I laugh (for the first time) at how feeble the writing is. Zero coherency and zero intelligence are the themes of this show.
At first, I thought Magical Shopping Arcade Abenobashi would be weird and simply not my sort of thing. A few episodes in however, it became more and more twisted, less and less funny. There is little to analyse here, for nothing makes sense, even the message they try to cram in at the end. I cannot fathom what audience the creators had in mind because it is inappropriate for kids with its underage nudity and not-so-subtle sexualisation, while too stupid for adults.
Art – Low
With characters super deformed for comedic effect at all times, it kills any potential for visual humour. No effort went into the art, especially the characters with no detail or lighting depth to them. Voice and mouth doesn’t synchronise half the time.
Sound – Very Low
Many of the music tracks are rip-offs of famous themes, especially Star Wars ones, done poorly. The voice acting is as obnoxious and ear grating as the characters, no matter if many of these actors have done great voices elsewhere. You may claim hearing damage compensation.
Story – Very Low
Such rubbish. The obnoxious and creepy characters would have been fine if humorous. They aren’t.
Overall Quality – Very Low
Recommendation: Don’t watch this torture. Magical Shopping Arcade Abenobashi isn’t even so bad it’s good.
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