Japanese Title: Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase
Similar: Dance in the Vampire Bund
Watched in: Japanese & English
Genre: Supernatural Vampire Comedy
Length: 25 episodes
Positives:
- None.
Negatives:
- Worst opening in anime?
- Low budget visuals and ugly character design.
- Weak and annoying characters compose just about the entire cast. Fails at being cute even after trying so hard.
- One joke throughout. One gimmick throughout.
- Pedobear’s favourite kind of anime.
What am I doing with my life? Why do I waste my time watching such trash? It’s because I love watching the bad just as much as the good. As long as there is something to analyse, I find it fun. Unfortunately with Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase, it doesn’t have much on offer, even in the awful department, as it discharges its contents within a few episodes before it hits the repeat button.
Kouhei is a photographer and often captures the supernatural on film by accident. When visiting a castle in Germany for work, he meets a vampire (loosest definition) girl, Hazuki, who tries to hypnotise him into being her slave, but it doesn’t work because he is ‘spiritually retarded,’ as his grandfather puts it, and the supernatural stuff doesn’t affect his thick skull. She uses him to break the seal on the castle, allowing her to escape to Japan in search of her mother.
In Japan, she forces herself into Kouhei’s life and invites herself to live with his grandfather. Meanwhile, other vampires work to take her back to Germany.
This setup has little to do with Moon Phase as a whole. A more accurate pitch would be ‘A little girl with a cat complex that we are supposed to believe is a vampire moves in with some guy and they bicker a lot. The occasional supernatural entity shows up to pretend as if there is a plot before they bicker once more.’ It’s a few episodes of mundane nothing in the family’s pottery shop while he tries to make it as a photographer for a magazine. Then we have to sit through a few episodes of so-called action. Back to nothing, then action again, and so on. You can’t imagine how painful this feels for twenty-six episodes.
Hazuki’s kitten impression makes one want to claw their own face off, wearing cat ears and meowing all the time. This is supposed to be cute? Kittens are cute; this is hideous. And she calls him ‘big brother’? Just kill it now, with fire. Kouhei is a wimp, weak-willed and never does anything about the spoiled cat-girl. Their relationship is one I have seen many times before with her as your typical moe, going from “cutesy” (loosest possible definition) to abusive to crying if anyone says anything. I have never wished more for a twist to be her blowing her own brains out at the end, ideally, because she realises she isn’t cute. They use the one joke repeatedly about him being her slave and no one is allowed to touch him. I know these writers think that having characters bickering all the time makes for conflict, but it doesn’t, not if there is no point to it. Oh, what? They argue to hide that they really love each other? Spare me that drivel. Did I mention she’s twelve and he’s an adult? Never mind the other two twelve-year-olds they bring in to complete his pedo-harem.
Later on, she gets a familiar, a mini catgirl that is just as irritating and as devoid of charm. Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase tries much too hard to be cute, failing at every instance. It keeps ramming it down your throat and punching your sanity as it yells, ‘ADORE ME!’ I don’t know how they expected anyone to take the attempts at emotion seriously when a supposed-vampire girl pretending to be a cat stands there in the middle of the scene.
Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase is trash. Don’t waste your time on this; even if you like catgirls, there must be something better to do. In vampire terms, this has a vampire that needs glasses…yes, that makes sense…
Art – Very Low
The entire budget went into making decent backgrounds. The characters have no detail, poor animation, and are ugly – the backgrounds make the low quality stand out even more. The inconsistency is the worst.
Sound – Low
What the hell is this opening? Weirdest…something…I have ever seen. If I have to listen to that opening theme on more time, I will strangle a kitten. The ending music sounds like someone on a singing contest too shy to sing and just mumbles into the mike. Forgettable BGM, often inaudible, and the voice acting sounds like a script read. I particularly hate the squeaky voices.
Story – Very Low
Whoever thought that a story about a little girl vampire pretending to be a cat was a good idea should find another job. Was it you, Pedobear?
Overall Quality – Very Low
Recommendation: Do anything else. Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase is the epitome of neko-sugoi-chan-desu-desu-kawaii rubbish. It tries to be cute, it tries to be funny, it tries to be charming – it fails at all.
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Awards: (hover mouse over each award to see descriptions; click award for more recipients)
Positive: None.
Negative:
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I’ve always wondered if this anime was trying to make the two main characters have a brother/sister relationship, or an outright pedophile relationship
I mean every episode title starts with Big Brother, so it’s hard to tell at times
Nefarious, I have some recommendations for worst anime of all time
Perhaps you have heard of them?
Try Magical Warfare, Pupa, that Smartphone anime, Love Tyrant, or even Omamori Himari
Hand Shakers, or High School D x D
Dx D was so terrible I couldn’t even finish the first season, literally
And I rarely ever drop an anime, no matter how awful it is
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Whichever the answer, it’s certainly creepy.
I am building up a collection of awful to do a month of bad anime in search of the absolute worst. I have some of those already, though I will add the rest. I’ve reviewed Hand Shakers here: https://nefariousreviews.com/2017/07/30/hand-shakers-anime-review/
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Ah yes, I missed your review for Hand Shakers, but I have read it
Yeah, even on MAL it has a pretty low rating, and that’s pretty horrible considering that a lot of MAL reviewers tend to praise crappy anime that pander to the least common denominator
So I suppose Hand Shakers was a whole other level of horrible
Speaking of horrible, if you do watch Omamori Himari, be warned that has to be one of the WORST anime I have ever seen, and I have seen some bad ones
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Watch the Japanese version of Himari BTW
The way Yuuto screams out Himari’s name it makes you want to
punch the guy in the throat
It’s like the guy doing Yuuto’s voice hates the character completely
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How is this not funny? That opening slaughtered me! What happens in that initial bit? She keeps falling down, and then a pair of pink bunnies play whack-a-neko with her? I can’t breathe! It even has a random bear (whether it’s of the pedo variety is another matter).
Thank you for making sure I never watch this (not that the cover was appealing to begin with). Seriously, how do you tolerate such trash, even if it’s for reviews?
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I don’t know what it is. There’s fun in trash. Sometimes the fun comes in figuring out how it got so bad and what they could have done better.
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